SHITBAGxDETON8R's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[Some lore stuff for a new oc]

Well, I don't know much about flipaclip, but I can give you some general pointers;

1: The pacing is terrible. Things happen extremely quickly, and it's difficult to read the text on the screen in the split second it is there without pausing.

2: From the first point, if you are trying to convey information about your OC, having blocks of text is probably better in a format outside of video, like an art portal submission or blog post. Slow the pacing down, and add some kind of audio. Either tell a story via narration, or animate a story or pieces of it.

3: Most of your drawings are pretty basic. Right now the entire video is JUST the visuals, and several frames are just scribbles. Some are harsh white-on-black frames, others fairly dark lines on a harsh white background, and some are very dark with dark blue lines that aren't as clear or easy to pick out. There's a few frames of animation with the top hat-character (?) swaying back and forth, then it stops and opens a singular red eye on the center of the top area. That's not too bad, and has some potential to be visually striking, but then the arms (?) seem to change in shape from claws, to paddles, to hoops, to text, to a low-visibility frame where they're just noodles. You want some kind of consistency in your drawings first, then you can start worrying about smoothness.

You don't need to improve all of these at once, but if you want to show people something and receive a positive reaction you need to start from the top of the list and work your way down. Right now it's just 6 seconds of garbled pictures, if I look at the frames individually I can make out an attempt at a story, but it's missing a lot of chunks. Short and snappy can be fine for action or comedy, but if you want to share some kind of lore or deeper meaning you need to be a lot more deliberate.

I'm not trying to shit on a newbie, but if you genuinely want feedback I can give it. Animation is very difficult. I don't know what other options you have for software or tools.

0v0bfr responds:

Thank you for the info! I'll try making other animations in the future doing one by one!

[CHERNOBÃO SÔNICOOOOOO]

The premise and presentation wasn't so bad, but the loud crackling noises as part of the voice recordings made it pretty unwatchable. You desperately need to fix that if your intent is to entertain, not torment.

Nicolyarts responds:

sorry, but this video was inspired by another video from tiktok

[Pat and Ron's Bats and Scones]

These are still underrated IMO. There's a good flow to them, your characters are funny and dynamic, and the punchlines are often at the very least uncommon, or pretty original.

"That's what you get for having a wall!"

BigCronch responds:

thanks man! will keep at it anyway cause I do still enjoy it, I think I just need to make some at 1920x1080 and it'll help a bit more, cause I know on platforms like here and Youtube people would much rather prefer it.

[howd i do?]

The movement is okay, but there's no sound, it is VERY short, and it's mostly the same old Madness sprites everybody uses. You clearly have the basics down, so it should be pretty manageable for you to add a little more. Maybe some electronic music from the audio part of the site too!

smooth-Pb responds:

Thank you, ive been needing some criticism

[Everyday’s a Nice Day: Albatross.]

I definitely think the refinements are paying off in this one. The backgrounds and characters are distinct from one another, there's a bit of additional character animation where it matters to add expressiveness, and the timing and delivery works without any one part being grating or dragging on significantly. The ambience outdoors is a nice touch too - it helps the scene feel a bit more alive even during brief pauses. I appreciated the little details in the shot of the farm like the wires coming off the satellite dish.

For feedback, the only thing I can think of is relatability. Albatrosses are, indeed, freaky birds - but they're not very relatable, a lot of people have never seen one in their life, or at least not cared to study them very closely. I feel like the end bit where the dead albatross hits the ground could have the effect amplified with a brief super-detailed closeup similar to those Spongebob gags, after which Bill acknowledges that yeah, they are pretty freaky. Could help sell the punchline to the viewer, you know?

I guess another, less morbid/more family-friendly option could be to have the albatross be more of an actual character standing on the lawn, and Tofu repeatedly missing his shots (as Weebl once pointed out, cattle are not known for their dexterity and skill with weaponry) allowing Bill to complain about the noise, assess the albatross and maybe have it try to consume his head with its large beak, at which point Bill defeatedly does admit that indeed, they are freaky.

Overall a pretty solid improvement though!

EverythingByElias responds:

Thanks, I thought it was better too!

[Stay aware or else you'll get punched in the face...]

Damn. I was going to dumpster this, then the last 5 seconds happened and I was pretty impressed! You should do more with this!

T0bbit responds:

Oof! I'm glad you didn't lol. Thanks

[The Response Video]

Yeah, about right.

Pretty cool visuals and style, would be cool with some more frames here and there. The blood being a different art style from the rest was a neat choice. Nice and snappy at least.

Maybe the dancing pig would have been more poignant if it was bright pink on a neon green grass field to contrast against everything else being so monochrome? Kind of goes with the look of a lot of those crappy attention-grabbing videos, and the brightly colored buttons on the phone app. Just a thought.

DivanityRose responds:

Thank you.

I don't add that much colors because I want my animations to be in a monochromatic style,but making the pig's video in bright colors could have worked.

[OLD VHS haunted?]

Hmmm. Pretty alright. Didn't overstay its welcome, punchline was decent-to-good. Maybe Make the day 1 scene a little snappier, maybe some visual gag in the day 2 scene like some flickering to the lights to make it more eerie?

Not much to say about the visuals, very stylized and functional. The way you used the space was fine, some of it might be a bit too "dead" at points but I can't really think of any better way to do it either. Just about the only thing I think could be improved is the hole in the wall to make it mesh with the background a bit more, since the wall already has cracks drawn on with shading and highlights.

It just ticks all the boxes, but also doesn't really impress if that makes sense? I can't say anything truly bad about it, but also nothing extremely positive. I liked it, but didn't love it.

Comicdud responds:

Thank you for the thoughtful review! I really do appreciate the breakdown!

[BOB THE MAN: Literally every modern Anti-Woke show]

ong he just like me fr (I don't want a hug tho, I've been to cons and fursuits smell very bad)

The drawings are nice and I kind of wanted to give it a better score for that, but since it's very reliant on the dialogue the harsh robotic voices and difficulty making out everything they were saying hurt a lot. Like actually painful to my ears to try to intently listen to what is being said and try to catch the gags, especially the voice used for Bob.

That could be a gag in and of itself that he's so annoying to listen to, but it wasn't really enjoyable in this context.

BluetheFoxyboi responds:

I knew I should provide captions for this but at the same time, it's intentional that Bob's voice is scratchy and inaudible since he's a old man himself.

[OOOHHH YIIIKES.]

Ah man, this is a tough one - mostly because it's so long, so it's very hard to comment on any one particular thing!

Adding the voices definitely helps a lot. The quality is a bit mixed, but it's loud and clear with no sound effects or music interrupting, and the delivery is mostly fine. Way better than using some text-to-speech stuff. The gag with Tofu's swearing being bleeped was funny, though the actual mooing sound started getting extremely grating. Clicking through it again, a good example is at about 1:47 where Tofu just retorts with an "uh huh" but the sound effect lasts for a good 5 seconds, doesn't seem to align well with such a short response and there's not much of a gag payoff anywhere, and then the very same thing occurs right after at abour 2:05. It really slows the pace down and after a while it's kind of painful to listen to as it's kind of a slow, "scraping" sound. You could maybe get a similar effect through a visual gag with some extra face graphics, like one where the top half of the eyes are covered to create a disinterested expression? The other characters have at least a couple frames showing various moods, even the news anchor.

At 9:37 Tofu just seems to moo for no reason, was a line missing?

The backgrounds are definitely improved, though you could maybe tweak the colors in some to be a bit muted compared to the characters, or give the characters somewhat thicker outlines to stand out more against the backgrounds. Maybe not use black outlines for the backgrounds too, but it's not a massive problem. The "human" characters could probably use a couple extra identifiers since they all have the same voice, like Doc having some prominent glasses or something, and Rufus could have a more pallid complexion. Either that or lay it on thick with your best Igor impression. It's probably easiest to lay out the script, and then do all the lines for one character at a time with whatever impersonation or accent you want to use.

Animation is hard and there's always something that can be tweaked and polished, but I think you're on the right track. As stupid as it sounds, I think the mooing might be better if you just do it yourself so you can match the length to the lines better? The sound quality might be better too so it hurts less to listen to for 15+ minutes.

EverythingByElias responds:

Thanks (you seem like a cool guy). And yeah, Tofu was supposed to say "Well, I guess we're here" at that time, but I think something screwed up in the editing software, or I just accidentally deleted the text. In general, I just wanted to make something longer & more of substance, with the addition of voice acting (It took 5 days to make, I had a good time with this one!) Tofu is general is meant to be a static character, his face is meant to never show any emotion (unlike the other characters), so the only way he conveys emotion is through the text (it just made him unique from the other guys). And you know what, I think I might just voice Tofu for another video lol. Thanks for the advice, dude! :)